Happy New Year Dear Reader!
With the pandemic largely behind us, 2023 finally seems like it will be the year that will fold out to be “more normal” so that we can get on with our lives as they were before for the most part. It has been a super challenging few years for sure, but with that said, a lot of surprising events have also sprung from the pandemic for many of us on a personal level, and there is no denying that things have changed on a larger scale as well.
So, as 2023 is born, the coming of the new year often brings with it a time of pause and reflection. But for a lot of us, it can also bring with it feelings of anxiety and dread. Why? Because we tend to put tremendous pressure on ourselves while reflecting on all of those “insurmountable goals that we have yet to accomplish”. This often leads to feelings of “not being good enough” which then translates into the stress that comes along with forcing ourselves into figuring out how we’re going to kick 2 bad habits, establish 3 new boundaries, and create 4 new goals all jammed into the next 12 months with failure not being an option.
Phew! I’m sweating already!
The Pressure of New Year’s Resolutions
The voice in your head may be saying one or more of the following;
OMG!! This is the year ……
“I have to quit smoking!”
“I have to lose 20 pounds!”
“I have to find a new job!”
“I have to find a way to get the kids into more activities!”
“I have to start dating again!”
“I have to get my debt under control!”
“I have to (insert your high-pressure goal here)!”
Over the years, I have learned that New Year’s resolutions are just not for me – I became fed up with putting that much pressure on myself, and making myself feel as if I was a loser, never measuring up to where I wanted to be in life on January 1st.
Why do we do this to ourselves? This high-pressure structure to set goals absolutely sucks because it looks like something like this;
As soon as the New Year starts it will be a great time to;
- Wipe the slate clean and start fresh!
- Hyperfocus on a handful of goals that you’ve been struggling with and
- Figure out 100% how you’re going to achieve them – now!
Are you cringing with me as you are reading these? Exhausting huh? Ugh!
It’s no wonder most New Year’s resolutions are often dropped like a hot potato by the time February rolls around. This structure lacks grace, reeks of rigidity, strips away self-care, and worse, invites self-sabotage.
There’s A Better Alternative To These Resolutions…
Creating new habits and establishing new boundaries, (which is otherwise known as goal setting) doesn’t have to be this way – in fact, for the time that it takes you to read this article, let’s forget about goal setting all together for a while!
What if I offered you a gentler and more adventurous alternative? A structure for your life that looks something like this;
OMG! It’s January 2023, this is the time that you can:
Give thanks for the experiences you have had and appreciate that your life is exactly as it is – wow what a journey!
Decide that 2023 is going to be full of new adventures, surprising possibilities and exciting outcomes!
Follow your heart and your instincts down a new path – every single day!
Do you see how this alternative in looking forward actually feels better and brings a sense of excitement to your life? It’s all in your perspective!
This optimistic, yet realistic and fun-filled approach will leave you more at ease about your future which will then allow you to be in a more relaxed and open state. And guess what that means? When you’re in a more relaxed and open state – creativity can blossom and BOOM! Can you say growth by leaps and bounds here I come?
We Are Here On This Planet To Learn From One Another
So with that said, I like to approach my life as a continuous adventure and journey in progress, and one of my favorite things to do is to read books on different topics which help me gather insight into my own experiences and draw on additional insights through the thoughts and words of others. After all, we are each here on this planet to learn from one another – I am a big believer in that.
One of my favorite books is written by an author named Mark Manson. He wrote “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck”. For me, the content is raw, real, funny, a little over the top and at times even controversial. But what I truly love about it, are the many truths that Mark is able to reveal and clarify about complex human relationships and behaviours.
But how does this relate to money you ask?
Well, in every way! Our mindset or the perspective we take on any given subject ripples into all of our day to day experiences – including those we have with money. And although this is a much broader and deeper topic, money and the way we relate to it is very much determined by how we are wired and the perspective we apply to all other areas of our lives.
We are complex creatures, that’s for sure, so if getting a handle on your money stuff is something that you are struggling with, I invite you to read the following quotes and give yourself a break. You will see just how we all share what it means to be human.
And so, as the New Year kicks off, I’d like to share 10 of my favorite quotes by Mark Manson. I hope you like them and can relate to them on some level – even when it comes to money.
Enjoy!
10 Mark Manson Quotes That Will Help You Start The New Year Right
1. “To be happy, we need something to solve. Happiness is therefore a form of action”
2. “The desire for a more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience.”
3. “If pursuing the positive is a negative, then pursuing the negative generates the positive. For example, the pain you pursue in the gym results in better all around health and energy.”
4. “The pain of honest confrontation is what generates the greatest trust and respect in your relationships.”
5. “Life is essentially an endless series of problems to solve. The solution to one problem is merely the creation of another”
6. “The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering. The avoidance of struggle is a struggle. The denial of failure is a failure. Hiding what is shameful is itself a form of shame.”
7. “Improvement at anything is based on thousands of tiny failures, and the magnitude of your success is based on how many times you’ve failed at something.”
8. “Be motivated by something beyond simply money or glory”.
9. “Every new conversation, every new relationship, brings new challenges and opportunities for honest expression”
10. “Don’t just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow.”
I wish you all a wonderful start to 2023 – and remember, there is no reason to have those feelings of anxiety and dread. Kick those New Year’s resolutions to the curb, and join me in being in the present moment in this continuous adventure and journey we call life. Life is for living, after all!
